E-Paperback Writer Sells a Million, Why Can’t I?
Published June 22nd, 2011 | 
There’s a story in The Telegraph about a John Locke (not the philosopher or the character from Lost), who has sold over a million copies of his book self-publishing on the Kindle.
More and more the Kindle as a market for books is sounding very attractive. After all, at the rate I’m going, I won’t be able to collect much in the way of social security benefits even if that entitlement program does survive the debt crisis. So I need something to retire on. What d’ya think my odds of selling a million books on the Kindle?
Maybe Somebody Pissed in His Tea
Published April 22nd, 2011 | So my friend Cindy emails me this morning, telling me about this writer she’d published in the debut issue of Yellow Mama who requested that she remove his story and bio from the YM archive:
“I was wondering if you’d now be okay with removing it from the archives? This isn’t at all a comment on Yellow Mama, it’s simply that it’s a very old story that I’m not particularly happy with these days and, more importantly, a very out of date bio. The reason I ask now is that I’ve just sold a series of novels and this is coming up on the first page of google hits for my name; I’d much rather anyone looking for information on me was led to my current work and up to date information.”
Okay, so let me get this straight . . . guy wants his story and bio removed from her archive because he thinks the story sucks and his bio is out of date? Seriously? No, that’s not the reason because he goes on to say that he got himself a book deal and he doesn’t like it that YM’s page rank is higher than his own blog. How is that not a comment on YM? Of course it’s a comment on what he thinks of YM now that he imagines he’s in the big leagues.
Point one: As I told Cindy, since Cindy didn’t have an archive at the time she accepted the writer’s story and wasn’t accepting Internet archival rights at that time, the writer can technically request his removal. However, his reasons for doing so are ridiculous. Bios go out of date. Is he seriously going to write every editor who accepted his work and request they remove his bio? Of course not. And why would request the takedown of any link for information about him when he’s trying to promote a book? YM’s target audience is the same audience he’s trying to reach. Are you going to tell me that those readers don’t buy books?
Point two: If his blog doesn’t rank as high in Google as YM, why not, instead of fucking with YM’s page rank, do something constructive to raise the page rank of his own website?
Point three: What an arrogant dickhead! Who does he think he is? Let’s see . . . you’re an unknown writer who gets a story published by an editor and some years later, after you’ve made a little bit of a name (or at least after you imagine you’ve attained a certain level of literary celebrity), you decide it’s perfectly okay to take a big steaming dump on the editor because she knew you before you were sitting at the cool kids table. That’s fucking sad. I say, let’s dig some big ol’ outdoor fire pits, light’em up and toss his ass in for roasting.
Another Writer Thumbs His Nose at Traditional Publishers
Published March 15th, 2011 | James Frey, the author or the faux-memoir A Million Little Pieces that embarrassed Oprah Winfrey (Heaven forbid!), is now taking on religion with his new novel, The Final Testament of the Holy Bible, a story about the second coming. This book will be no less controversial than his first effort in that it Frey’s Jesus is a sex and drug-addicted loser rather than the super being depicted in Christian theology.
However, what is perhaps more interesting about this book is that it will not be published by a major publishing company. Rather, he will release it next month via the Gagosian Gallery. It will be released in an initial printing of 10000 copies and eBook editions.
What I’m wondering is, was this Frey’s first choice for publishing this book, or did his publisher not want to publish it because of the subject matter? A few years back, Frey signed a multi-million dollar deal with HarperCollins and, unless I’m mistaken, he still owes them two books. If Frey chose to publish his novel via a Gallery, then it’s a bold, innovative and brave move on his part. If his publisher passed on the novel, then it’s more proof that major publishers are chickenshit.
Anyway, it’ll be interesting to see how this book performs. I’m betting it won’t make it on Oprah’s Book Club, however.
